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May 25, 2019, 11:20:50 PM
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|-+  General Upholstery Questions and Comments
| |-+  General Discussion
| | |-+  End of the week humorous amusing anecdote (formerly Friday Funny)
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: End of the week humorous amusing anecdote (formerly Friday Funny)  ( 4344 )
YaBB God

Karma: +1/-0
: 3137

« #180 : May 11, 2019, 08:35:50 AM »


YaBB God

Karma: +4/-1
: 1546

« #181 : May 11, 2019, 10:22:59 AM »

and you know how valued Barkley's analysis are - just don't ask him to predict a BB game outcome

What kind of mileage are you getting???

Gallons  --
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines 5 years ago, you
Would have $49.00 today! If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman
Brothers 5 years ago, you would have $0.00 today.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the
Beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for the recycling refund, you would
Have received $214.00.  Based on the above, the best current investment
Plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.

And as a bonus...A recent study found the average American walks about 900
Miles a year.  Another study found that on average Americans drink 22
Gallons of alcohol a year. That means that the average American gets
About 41 miles to the gallon!

Makes you damned proud to be an American!
YaBB God

Karma: +2/-0
: 4536

All types of upholstery.....except cars and boats.

« #182 : May 17, 2019, 07:58:43 AM »

A woman asks her husband "What would you like for breakfast? Bacon and eggs? Pancakes?"
The man replied "Sorry, I'm just not very hungry. It's the . I just don't have an appetite".

At lunch, she asks again "How about a sandwich? Or maybe we could order a pizza?"
Again, the husband tells her that the  has suppressed hi appetite.

Later that evening, she says "Well surely you're ready to eat supper. How about steak and potatoes with a big slice of apple pie?"
The husband responds "Sorry, but I'm still not hungry. This  has just totally killed my appetite".

The wife then says "Well would you mind getting off me then? I'm starved!"

"Perfection is the greatest enemy of profitability" - Mark Cuban
YaBB God

Karma: +4/-1
: 1546

« #183 : May 21, 2019, 12:10:14 PM »

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.
Three women from England, Scotland, and Ireland were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.
The English woman said 'Have you ever had a hug?' The man said, 'No'
so she gave him a hug and walked on.
The Scottish woman said, 'Have you ever had a kiss?' The man said, No,
so she gave him a kiss and walked on.
The Irish woman came to him and said, 'ave ya ever been f%*#ed lad?'*
The man broke into a big smile and said, 'no'.
She said, ‘Aye…..Ya will be when the tide comes in.
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