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October 23, 2018, 06:49:01 PM
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| | |-+  End of the week humorous amusing anecdote (formerly Friday Funny)
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: End of the week humorous amusing anecdote (formerly Friday Funny)  ( 1296 )
Darren Henry
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some days are better than others


« #75 : October 21, 2018, 08:38:36 AM »

My initial reaction to the last question was "shore lunch". Eat the damned chicken and sell the feed. Problem solved!

But then I'd have to wait an hour to cross.

The new plan is to convince the fox to swim with me as I took the feed across and then come back for the chicken.


Life is a short one way trip, don't blow it!Live hard,die young and leave no ill regrets!
sofadoc
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All types of upholstery.....except cars and boats.


« #76 : October 21, 2018, 09:24:38 AM »

My initial reaction to the last question was "shore lunch". Eat the damned chicken and sell the feed. Problem solved!

But then I'd have to wait an hour to cross.

The new plan is to convince the fox to swim with me as I took the feed across and then come back for the chicken.

You swim across with the chicken first, place him on the other side, and swim back.

Then swim across with the fox. Put the fox down, pick up the chicken, and swim back.

Put the chicken down, pick up the chicken feed, and swim to the other side.

Put the chicken feed down on the other side with the fox, and swim back to fetch the chicken.

Of course, all of this is contingent on the fox or chicken not running away while left alone.

"Perfection is the greatest enemy of profitability" - Mark Cuban
gene
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« #77 : Today at 06:14:13 AM »

Big brother is 4 years old. Little brother is half his age. How old will little brother be when big brother is 100?

* Based on average life expectencies, little brother is long dead when big brother is 100.

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A doctor gives you 3 pills, and instructs you to take 1 every half hour. How long will it take you to consume all 3?

* If taking 3 pills every half hour will make me feel better, then taking all 3 pills immediately would make me feel better even sooner. It takes me about 2 seconds to consume all 3 pills.

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You have 2 items totaling $11. One item is $10 more than the other item. How much does each item cost?

* In my state at 7% sales tax, a total of $11 means $10.28 for the 2 items and $.72 sales tax. Therefore, if one item is $10.00 more than the other item, then one item costs $10.14 and the other item costs $0.14.

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You are sent to a well to fetch EXACTLY 4 gallons of water. All you have is a 5 gallon bucket and a 3 gallon bucket. How do you do it? No estimating allowed. Must be 4 gallons exactly.

* A gallon of water weighs 8.34 lbs, plus the weight of the two buckets. 4 gallons equals 33.4 lbs. plus the weight of the two buckets. I'm a furniture upholsterer and I need to be careful not to do anything that would hurt my back. So I would need to know how far I am going to carry 33.4 lbs. of water plus the weight of the two buckets before I would agree to fetch EXACTLY 4 gallons of water.

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You come to a river. You are carrying a fox, a chicken, and a bag of chicken feed. You can only carry one at a time as you swim across the river. You can't leave the fox alone with the chicken because he'll eat it. Likewise, you can't leave the chicken alone with the chicken feed. How do you do it?

* I swim across the river with the chicken and leave the fox and bag of chicken feed on the shore. The chicken claws and pecks at my face as I swim until I can't see from all the blood running in my eyes. In fear and desperation I drown the chicken just before I make it to the other shore. I then swim back and get the fox. I beat the fox to death with a rock so the fox can't eat away at my bloody face while I swim to the other shore with the fox. Then, leaving the dead fox with the dead chicken, I swim back and get the bag of chicken feed. Making it to the other shore with the bag of chicken feed, I then continue on my merry way having successfully crossed the river.
« : Today at 06:20:04 AM gene »

QUALITY DOES NOT COST, IT PAYS!
kodydog
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North Central Florida


« #78 : Today at 08:19:43 AM »

If the fox didn't eat the chicken before you got to the river why worry he will eat it while crossing the river. I'd just take the bridge.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
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